now & then
i wasn't planning on doing a separate q&a post just about me and my relationship, but i got an overwhelmingly large amount of questions on the subject. like, a lot. i like to be honest on my blog and in a lot of ways, i write it almost like i would a diary in terms of recounting what's going on in life. niklaas has been a part of that for almost two years and while i know everyone is here for different reasons, i'll probably continue to talk about him for as long as he's present. i guess i'm trying to get the point across that this is not a "look how great my boyfriend is" kind of blog and i don't ever want to make it seem that way. there are those out there that probably have their judgements (mean anonymous commenters that lurk around) but i truly do blog for myself first and it is important for me to write content that's prevalent in my life. aka, i'll always talk about the people in my life if there's something i want to remember about them. he's my best friend and one of my favorite people to hang out with and go on adventures with. but he's not my whole life by any means. i really did go back and forth on a separate q&a post all about him and me and us but in the end, i liked the idea and it was fun to read your questions! plus, niklaas contributes a lot to this blog by taking pictures and it's kind of fun to include him in this little celebration of sorts. so here we go!
how did you meet?
her: i think the first time i really connected his name 'niklaas' to his face (i always heard about him or of him in high school) was when we ended up sitting together on the plane to mexico. of course, i was more interested in another boy sitting next to me and niklaas had a girlfriend so it wasn't more than a i-think-this-kid-is-the-cutest-kid-i've-ever-met-and-i-want-to-be-his-best-friend kind of attraction. i didn't have a crush on him until we spent an entire day together playing hooky at my elementary school with our mexican exchange students... and he still had a girlfriend.
him: In the airport on the way to save baby sea turtles! No big deal or anything.
what is your favorite thing about one another?her: i think my favorite things are the things people don't know about him that i know. like, he's an amazing poet. and he's really bad at saying he isn't okay (we have that in common). and he loves hip-hop. he can be good at talking about "real" things alone but be outrageously funny around groups of people, too. and i like his pictures a whole lot. and i like that we're complete opposites but still similar. for example, you can probably tell that i talk a lot and he doesn't but that's okay. and he's just one of my favorite people.
him: Her contagious smile and passion! Definitely her passion for...well, just about everything. And her contagious laugh. Really. And how she listens to all the bands I force upon her. How she's pretty open to just about everything, and that she's so supportive of all my photos, really! It means a ton to me, since I definitely wouldn't keep it up if people didn't enjoy it. That and her writing, which is fantastic. Seriously.
how did you make long distance work &
would you do it all over again?
her: i ask myself every day how we made it work and i really don't have an answer. we talked on the phone, texted, and skyped... but it was still the worst thing in the world and i'd only ever do it again under similar circumstances. he had wanted to go to montana for a long time so we knew there was a possibility that we wouldn't be long distance for more than a year. i think at the end of the day what got us through was just liking each other more than the distance set us back.
him: It was a lot of texting and phoning and skyping, but it was terrible, really terrible, and I don't know if I could do it again. It was rough, really rough.
how long have you been together &
how did you get together?
her: three months away from two years! when his girlfriend came back, he left shortly after for a trip to california. i knew i had to tell him somehow that i was half in love with him but i couldn't actually "do" anything but let him figure it out himself. which i kind of accidentally helped by giving him a taylor swift cd that basically confessed my feelings.
him: 21 months! Everything she said is true, It just kind of happened one day while I was off in California, and it was kind of a shock when I realized it, but...what are you going to do?
describe one another's style?
her: i love his clothes! i think it's cool that he went from an all flannel wearing hipster to a cashmere, cardigan, button down, boat shoe, and layering kind of guy. i look at him and giggle pretty frequently.
him: I really enjoy her clothes, she's big into patterns and florals, which I'm really not into all that much, for myself that is, so it's fascinating to see how our styles are pretty dialectical.
what's your favorite memory together?
her: oh man! it looks like we have the same one. shucks! but i agree. going to tswift was incredible. not even the concert, but driving 8 hours together to seattle was fantastically fun and exciting and adventurous. we didn't feel 18, and in fact, we didn't feel like any age at all. we were just one with the road and listened to music and talked and just... drove. it was amazing. we took a pit stop at a park for two hours and napped and laughed and read cosmo together in the grass which was a blast.
him: Is it weird that mine is exactly the same? Well, it is. Driving is the best, seriously. You all should go on a road trip, just to do it.
do you have exciting adventures planned that you want to do &
what would you like to do in the future together?
her: i want to go on more adventures!!! glacier. the coast. canada?? someday europe?!
him: Traveling! Absolutely! There's nothing better.
describe your first kiss?
her: awkward!? well. maybe. i was 18 and probably the only 18 year old who had never had the experience, so it kind of took him four tries on four separate occasions. i seriously turned my cheek to him every time! hahahaa. i love that now. but i liked it nonetheless and it's a cute memory to look back on my fairytale-like prom with him and remember it that way.
him: Um, yeah. It was pretty awkward.... that's all I'll say.
what sets you (together) apart from other couples?
her: i think the fact that we're best friends first makes doing the most mundane things easy for us. errands. shopping. watching television shows. going to iHop for dinner. putting together packages to send people. it doesn't really matter what we do, we have fun no matter what. and being so different, it always keeps things interesting. we just kind of click.
him: I think that the best part is that we're fantastically compatible, we really get along better than most other couples I know. I think it's phenomenal, really, that we don't have many fights, or anything, we just really get along, and I think that's the best.
what's "your song"?
her: hmm! taylor swift definitely played a big part in us getting together by being the little bird to tell niklaas i was the one he belonged with. seriously, though. other than that... i always think of "home" by edward sharpe and the magnetic zeros because whenever i came home while i was away at school, he described the day i came home as "coming home edward sharpe style today". it made me blush.
him: Baby That's Not All by Josh Ritter. It's just...beautiful. Seriously. Just go listen. It'll make sense.
what is it like being at college together and going from
high school to college?
her: it's different than i ever expected it to be but it's also exactly the same, too. we do the same things. go on the same adventures. enjoy the same things. but being a "high school couple" is not the same as being a "college couple". we've had more things to work through but we've gotten to know each other better, too. and it's really cool to "grow up" with someone and see him exploring his own new world at college!
him: It's fascinating. Just the whole, having so much time to spend with each other, and then the times when we really shouldn't be spending every waking moment together, because it's just too much, so it was a difficult process, but in the end it's pretty fantastic.