Monday, January 28

things you may not know


  • while my roommate goes on dates every single night of the week (major exaggeration but this week she's at a staggering date number 3!), i sing one direction alone in my bedroom. only after i turn off every light in the apartment and lock both the front door and my own bedroom door. 
  • i come home every day from school and the first thing i do after taking off my pants is eat a spoonful of peanut butter and nutella. and then i watch tv until dinner or until a load of homework becomes too much for my anxiety and the tv experience is ruined. 
  • just because i'm doing this whole running thing, it doesn't mean in any way am i very athletic or noble. in fact, i think mentally it just justifies in my mind that the second bullet point is acceptable.
  • my biggest pet peeve is when people aren't genuine and have to copy other people. 
  • when i was 13, i slipped a note to the boy i liked at the time. i was in love with his... hair? hot 14 year old bod? never will i live this down in my own head. no one knows about it but him and i, but if i could take anything back in my life, it would be that one thing. 
  • sometimes on this blog i feel like i'm living this big fat lie that my life is remotely interesting or special. it's definitely not. i'm just one of those people that makes a big deal of the little things that are good and bad and can write about them for hundreds of words. 
  • i know i'm 20 and college is supposed to be made of the best years of my life, but i really hope that's not true. i'm happy with the few friends i have that i trust beyond a doubt and i'm happy sometimes being a loner. sometimes college feels like just a stepping stone to "what's next" and i hope with all the work i've put into college, next is so much more.
  • my fruit intake primarily consists of frozen strawberries and blueberries.
  • sometimes i think i have something figured out. and then i'm promptly proven wrong.
  • growing up, i had the biggest gap between my two front teeth. when i got told my braces would fix it, i actually cried in the orthodontist's chair.
  • i think the only thing i crave in another person anymore is good, honest conversation. 
  • i've been really immature in how i've handled past friendships that went sour. and i hope someday in the future i'll learn to be able to part ways gracefully from friendships that drift apart instead of letting the hurt get the best of me. 
  • because i didn't hit puberty until i was in 8th grade, i was 4'9" and weighed 68 pounds in 7th grade. my "growth spurt" only amounted to two whole inches. 
  • there was a time during my junior year of high school that i spent almost every friday night watching pride and prejudice.

Saturday, January 26

progression into adulthood!

sometimes, i really have to manipulate myself to do (or not do) something. as far as half marathon training goes, i have a reward system in place for when i reach my goals. this morning, as i was driving back to my apartment, my autopilot kicked in and i was about to flash my turn signal to drive through my favorite coffee espresso stand. NO, i thought to myself, YOU DON'T NEED IT. of course, i fought with myself internally for all of thirty seconds before a car was behind me and promptly came up with a solution! maggie, if you don't get coffee, you can get a brand new *mug* at target today when you go buy coffee grounds. isn't that so much better!? you'll enjoy a new mug far longer than the fifteen minutes of pleasure you'd get out of an overpriced 16oz vanilla chai tea latte! and so, everyone, the first step of being an adult and being made (mostly) financially responsible was made today by turning down the coffee and instead getting a mug. and like a sign from the heavens signaling that i'd made the smarter choice, target had a 50% off kitchenware sale today so for the price of one coffee, i got two new mugs that will keep me happy all semester long! how is that for adulthood?!
  mugs

Friday, January 25

happier.

DSC_0347 copy DSC_0291
Blogging is great. Not just because it means the sweater you improperly tucked into your skirt gets captured on camera. Sometimes, it means you befriend stylish people that can tell you what to wear when your clothes haven't found their way into the closet yet and are a snapchat video away from a does this work? confirmation. Dillon and Kylee, you are my spirit animals.

Today I hit a new PR for running and while I promise this isn't going to become a running blog, I was practically crying in my car when it was over out of sheer sweaty joy. Sure, I'm going to try this half marathon training thing, but do I actually think I can do it!? Hardly. Barely! But two weeks ago I didn't think I'd be able to run as far as I have and I can only imagine how it's going to feel when I can run 7, 9, and 11 miles. Saying it now feels like an impossible idea that I'll ever be able to run that far. A far off dream that belongs in Narnia.

On that note, today I'm starting my new job as a Nanny! Being back in Montana with a new major, job, and goals in hand I'm starting to feel like things are coming together. I firmly believe things happen for a reason and with everything that went wrong last year, I'm starting to discover why they did. Simply put, I wouldn't be this me without last year. And I wouldn't change a thing.

LASTLY, I am officially going to promise a video tutorial on how I curl my hair so that you can all hold me to it.
DSC_0298 DSC_0309 DSC_0343 DSC_0382 DSC_0300
sweater: the gap // shirt: jcrew // skirt: ruche //
tights: modcloth // boots: forever21

Wednesday, January 23

coat of dreams

DSC_0676
Here's the thing about this coat: there is no coat like it.

And as far as I'm concerned, when you find a coat that earns the compliment, "You look like a New York woman!" while you're in Coeur D' Alene, Idaho and although you're not even sure anyone in Idaho could tell you what exactly that means, you take it and you run with it. Far. And never, ever take it off. I surely haven't (my instagram will prove that) and who knows, I might try to make it work until June. We did get snow once in Idaho in June, so I'm not ruling it out completely. Also the fact that it was 40% off didn't hurt, either.

Low and behold, I suffered the four and a half drive by myself to Montana yesterday! Things that may have happened: in a split second decision to end my own life by swerving into a semi or the life of a pheasant that was peacefully and unknowingly putting his own life in danger by choosing to perch in the center of my lane, I chose the pheasant (otherwise I wouldn't be here, blogging about it), spotting another Subaru with a 'montana griz' sticker on its window and staying 200 yards behind it for the entire duration of the Coeur D' Alene to Missoula portion of the drive, stopping when said Subaru pulled into a rest area to use the bathroom and observing an adorable boyish faced what-I-can-only-imagine-to-be-a-freshmen get out of it, and nearly losing my voice after so much car singing. Then again, they all may have happened.

I then spent all of last night and all of this morning doing the only thing that is best to do when you have an apartment (your own apartment, nonetheless!) all to yourself: laying in bed and watching too much tv, organizing emails and replying to a few, thinking about unpacking my suitcases that didn't make it further than my door entryway, and of course, doing everything without pants on.

DSC_0656 DSC_0681 DSC_0696DSC_0701DSC_0691DSC_0686
coat: zara // dress: thrifted // scarf: nordstroms // boots: forever21 //
tights: the gap

Sunday, January 20

things i've learned lately: pt 2

with only two weeks left in january i am not upset that the month is flying by even if blogging is sort of, well, passing me by, too. luckily i think i reached the point of no return with winter break which is admitting i'm ready to go back to school (*cough* live in my own apartment, sleep in my own bed, and cuddle with my favorite cat mister again *cough*). that isn't to say i haven't learned some things this month, though.

things i've learned lately:
  • don't keep every spare key you own on your primary key ring with all your other valuable keys when your mom is driving your car. she WILL lock your car keys in your car while on a road trip and a lock smith WILL have to be called and to top it all off, the car WILL still be running when she does this. at least the car was adequately warmed up nearly an hour later...?
  • if you have nothing to say, just don't blog. the feeling is better than anything and eventually the 'oh my gosh i haven't blogged in two days' eye twitch DOES go away (i'm afraid to say i actually forgot about blogging for the past three days completely and holy crap, it was a lovely internet free vacation.)
  • when you're afraid of saying something, that usually means it's that much MORE important to talk about. and it's not as scary as you play it out to be in your head. or at least, it IS that scary, but it might turn out you weren't the only one thinking it.
  • ALWAYS spontaneously buy plane tickets to visit your grandma. you'll do it far too quickly and book the cheapest flight without much of a glance at the total trip duration and accidentally wind up with a 7 hour layover in colorado on the return trip. and the best thing that could ever happen will happen which is an inevitable blog meetup with your soulmate. (still po-ed that the salt lake city airline tickets were TRIPLE what the denver connecting flight tickets were, though, because in a perfect world i could have arranged my layovers in both places and hit up two bloggers!? is this getting obsessive!? too convenient!?)
  • just when you don't think the job Gods are going to grant you with a 15 hours per week part time minimum wage of a gift, you'll score a job interview. don't. give. up. hope. keep sending your resume, schedule, and references in a single email thanking them exactly three times in each to every single job employer on the student employment website because you will get emails back and one will result in a follow up interview! (but now i have an interview to prepare for, pray for me please.)
  • if you're anywhere near an urban outfitters during their 'additional 50% off clearance sticker price' GET YOUR BUM THERE. even if it means wearing sweats tucked into your winter sorel boots and unwashed hair. do i talk about the state of my unwashed hair too frequently? ... in all honesty, i've averaging a shower every 2.25 days on winter vacation. the fact that i use dry shampoo and if i ever met one of you on a blog meet up i promise i would be freshly showered should ease your minds, though.
  • when you get to the point on your four mile run you literally call your mom nearly in tears because your OHMYGOSH *huge* blister is about to pop, your calves have turned to rock, and the frigid 3 degree weather burns your throat with every inhale, JUST KEEP RUNNING. you will complete your run when she doesn't answer and you will live to blog about it.
  • when your grandmother provides unsolicited advice on your new hair dye that isn't so new anymore but still refuses to let go of (the words "sickly" and "malnourished" were involved) and your state of singleness (the phrase "when i was your age i had several serious boyfriends i could have married" was used), it's best to have both someone on hand a text away to retell every horrendous comment and a plate full of her cookies to stuff your mouth with. some sassy comments weren't repressed, however, and for that i advise a full night's sleep. rookie mistake, really.
  • three year old's give the best hugs. and kisses. and wake up calls. and take the best pictures.
cutey

Thursday, January 17

uh, oh.

DSC_1676
so it's one in the morning and i'm back home nestled into the familiar burgundy couch i will argue is the comfiest couch in the entire world (the amount of times i've fallen asleep on it during a movie after 7pm is embarrassing). i was in one of my "blah, i've done nothing for two days and if i don't do something i'm going to cry of boredom" kind of moods. but it was one in the morning and what can you do when your only friend is a cup of tazo tea but stare at the ceiling. tv was simply not an option. three days straight of twelve hour tv days can do that to a person (okay, maybe eight). so naturally i let my mind wander which is a very, very bad thing to let my mind do because it will travel to dangerous places as i'm about to explain. the mordor of dark places. and the question someone had asked me earlier in the day stuck itself in my brain, backed it into a corner, and finally forced it to answer that cruel monster of a question. take that, question.

what are you going to do with your english major now, maggie? 
to the people that have since asked, i answered with faked confidence, "become a writer! of course!" which might be true but it's safer than the actual answer i came up with at one in the morning.

and the one i came up with, finally shoving that question back into the corner it had stuck me in, I DON'T KNOW!

i have no idea! i couldn't tell you if i'm going to be a writer let alone what kind of writer i would be if that were true or what direction i will take. maybe if people keep paying me to take their pictures that's what i'll do! i do love taking pictures. maybe an internship this summer will make me realize exactly what i want to do! maybe it will prove to me what i don't want and i'll be forced to take yet another direction!

the point is? you graduate high school and you're expected to go to college and pick a major and while you aren't really expected to know exactly what you want to do someday, you're expected to come up with a vague "smart" answer. at least, that's what adults want to think when you mumble what you want to do after you enter the real world with your college degree. but for the first time, i'm happy being 20 years old and having no answer. i'm happy to own up to that and look them in their worried faces and say, "i don't know." and i'm happy that even though i don't know, it doesn't mean i'm lazy, it just means this is an opportunity to work even harder to make opportunities happen for myself and follow my gut to figure out just what i love to do. and if anything in the past two and a half years, i have learned what hard work is. i was just missing the part of the equation that was passion.

i'm figuring it out and hanging on to every cheesy quote out there and by golly, i'm going to do what i love.
 DSC_1684
DSC_1678 DSC_1681

Tuesday, January 15

finally! a vlog!

january is kind of maybe my least favorite month. and apparently, a lot of other bloggers agree. WHERE IS THE INSPIRATION? gone, i tell you. i need to get back to school so i have dating horror stories to experience and share, horrible exams to take, car problems to vent about, and coffee shops to find a peace of mind in. regardless, i finally present you with the promised vlog from last month. and, um, it makes me cringe, and actually i find the least awkward part to be the bloopers. ENJOY!
 

Friday, January 11

a snowy winter time adventure

DSC_1395
recipe for a successful snowy winter photo adventure:
  • wait for it to start snowing and then put on your brightest colored dress, patterned tights, and your all weather can-withstand-below-zero-temperature boots.
  • grab a friend and a car with four wheel drive (more necessary than any of the above).
  • drive eight miles to your neighboring town and pick up two more friends with nice cameras that also happen to be wonderful people that make you laugh.
  • find a forest on the edge of a highway, park in the middle of the road (not actually recommended because farmers will probably get mad at you)(that didn't happen but it definitely could have), and walk across a field to get to said forest in foot deep snow.
  • enter forest, take the best most wintery pictures of the season, and be sure to be caught in the worst of the storm during the entire shoot.
  • make sure everyone wears pea coats and color coordinates. this was unplanned on our part.
  • WEAR GLOVES. we did not do this and by the time we got back in the car after a grueling 45 minutes (does it show!?) and put the high on the highest setting it could possibly go, our fingers and toes (not mine, just theirs) ached.
  • forget your wallet so you have an excuse to hang out with your gal pal named grace before she leaves for big bad washington dc again so you can buy her coffee next time.
it was the best afternoon, every cold finger and toe considered. more pictures to come! and because i don't know who was taking pictures with my camera and any given time, THANK YOU KATY/DANIELLE/GRACE! 
DSC_1394DSC_1621DSC_1575DSC_1404DSC_1399 DSC_1389
dress: ruche // boots: sorel // scarf & belt: thrifted // tights: the gap

Wednesday, January 9

born to be your dead sea

DSC_1283d
You know when you have a string of bad days you can't shake, but days that aren't bad for any sort of reason, they just lack a certain amount of zest and excitement that other days have? And the fact that you are grumpy for no reason at all just makes it that much worse because you start to feel bad that you don't have a reason to feel bad. Nonetheless, I woke up this morning to yet another gloomy rainy day and decided to shrug off another day of running because GOSH, look at that weather, I would be crazy to go outside in that! And that's when the lightbulb went off that here I was, giving myself another pitiful excuse to sit at home doing nothing all day and have an inevitable lackluster day. I seem to always do this sort of thing where I let myself not do something because there is a justifiable excuse not do it and then sort of secretly dare myself in my head that I can do it. Sunny outside? Eh, I twisted my ankle so I shouldn't run. Snow, rain, and win mix? YES, OF COURSE! Challenge accepted! You bet I can do it! Clearly, training for my half marathon is going to be the ultimate test of my mind I've ever had. The physical challenge I just know isn't going to be nearly as difficult as battling myself.

The coolest thing that has ever happened to me happened while I was wearing this outfit. It was only coincidence (I swear!) that I was in a coffee shop when it happened (I was only there to have the best latte in the entire state of Idaho!). While standing in line to order this latte that beats all other lattes, I saw the most stylish person I have ever seen in the entire Pacific North West walk in. I mean, this girl just oozed cool. So, of course, I wrote her off immediately as being anywhere near approachable and shrunk into my coat and scarf ignoring the fact that she got in line behind me. After ordering, I stood to the side waiting for the latte of all lattes to be delivered into my hands and felt a tap on my shoulder. The daintiest least-intruding-of-your-personal-bubble kind of taps. And, it was Stylish Girl! Talking to me! Telling me she loved my shoes and how she thought my "entire look" was so "cool" (I have serious issues with this word and I so badly wanted to accept her praise and hold my head high to it) to which I replied, "Oh, gosh! I'm not! It's just the shoes! I swear! You are cool! I have been admiring your outfit since you walked in!" And then I discovered great things about her (she's a fashion major! from New York! and squeezes lemon juice onto her hair to make it so shiny!) and I continued to want to hide in a corner because she was flowering me with too many compliments (looking back I should have just said, let's share a pastry! you'll see my elegance shine when i devour this dinner plate sized cinnamon roll in 0.3 seconds and you can watch all the crumbs collect in my scarf!). I almost considered asking for her phone number or last name so I could look her up on Facebook, but I decided that wouldn't be very "cool" of me (like I actually care about such a thing! I have to shake out my scarves after every single meal! I should have!).

Anyways, I'm glad I can come back here to my corner of the universe where I'm Maggie and you all know the truth. 
DSC_1278 DSC_1229 DSC_1287 DSC_1215 DSC_1220
dress: forever 21 // tights: target // shoes: jeffrey campbell

Monday, January 7

she wears her heart on her knees

DSC_0612 DSC_0625
Come back to Idaho. Realize that I don't have any "spots" anymore like I have in Montana that take careful, careful consideration and many tests to prove worthy of being a blog picture taking location. My rules are generally as follows: within 2 miles of my place of residence, little to no population of people around, flat, out of the way but not far enough that I couldn't be heard screaming if someone attacked the girl wearing heels and a short dress taking pictures of herself, and did I mention isolated...? Isolation is key. I'm still not quite comfortable with a crowd watching me. So at the moment, my backyard is going to have to suffice until I put on my brave face. And also unglue my butt from the sofa for more than an hour. Right now, it's still pretty stuck there.

If you follow me on twitter or on instagram you MIGHT remember (but probably don't) me saying that the dress/sweater laying combination was the best thing I've ever worn. Maybe not for style, but certainly for comfort. Anymore, this is my go to and what I wear half the week. Any crew neck sweater layered over a dress with tights. And most usually with some scarf or pair of boots. It's seriously the comfiest outfit ever and I finally decided it was time to blog myself in this new casual uniform of mine so I can tell you that your body hasn't lived until you've tried it. Comfort at its very best.
DSC_0634 DSC_0615 DSC_0592 DSC_0646 DSC_0654 DSC_0626
sweater: the gap // dress: forever 21 // boots: keva //
scarf: mom's closet // tights: modcloth

Saturday, January 5

guest blog for jen!

finished_11
if you want to see the front of my outfit (or my face), a closer
picture of these shoes, and read what i have to say about why
these shoes are the last shoes i would have
ever imagined myself wearing, wander over
to jen's blog to see my guest post!

Friday, January 4

things i learned this week: pt 1

in 2013, 'things i learned this week' is going to be a thing.
it's official. maybe it's because i'm awestruck by even the simplest of things that surprise me or that i seem to learn things the tremulous, awkward, and often embarrassing way, but there are things to figure out everywhere i turn! and so, this week, here you have it.

this week i learned
  • you know those extremely small planes that you only ride when you're traveling, say, less than 300 miles and sit in for no longer than an hour? for good reason, you think to yourself, as you ascend the runway and the entire plane shakes and squeals while you squeeze your eyes shut and mutter prayers under your breath this isn't about to be an episode of lost. yes, they are every bit as terrifying as they seem when you step onto the tarmac (!!) and get a full look at the slightly-larger-than-a-schoolbus object that will soon be 30,000 feet in the air with you enclosed. BUT, here's the thing. if you get a seat on the side with only a single seat, it's the ultimate win. better than the lotto. no bumping uglies with a married middle aged man wearing an oxford button up (be still your heart)(if only he wasn't married... and 15 years older than you) or the chatty 16 year old that you actually thought was 28 who thought you were 14. and because it's in the row of only single seats, you will guarantee a window seat for yourself. *the best*
  • when you're in a mood, and a serious one at that because not even 'ho hey' by the lumineers can make you dance in your chair and the thought catalog just makes you roll your eyes in haste, immediately confiding in someone will make you feel better. i think this might be a serious marker of growing up for me, who used to let bad moods sit and spoil in my head until it made me a nuisance to every single person within four feet of me. and also who refused to confide in anyone. it's a good feeling.
  • on a normal day, the thought catalog will read your mind better than a taylor swift song and spell every single one of your problems out until magically making them vanish with a dose of eloquence and humor.
  • snapchat is a great tool to get to know someone (by learning all about their ugly sides first), but not someone of the opposite sex you only met that one time and you mistakenly thought was pretty normal. who uses snapchat to try his one liners in limited clothing. it's too awkward to even elaborate on and makes my skin crawl thinking about it.
  • the high road, every single time, my dears. maybe if you're like me you jump to conclusions and while you might be right about them, it's not worth the energy to outwit the situation. roll your eyes and get on with it. it's a new year! people that are in the past belong there even when your stuff is stuck there.
  • 2012 was the year i learned to cry and learn it's a relatively normal response by my tear ducts when i see pictures of emma stone and andrew garfield on the internet or watch any movie with rebel wilson in it so 2013 will be the year i embrace that shamelessly. watch out! don't take me to any movies. the hobbit didn't see me coming. 
  • pink is actually pretty fantastic when paired with the lead singer from fun.
  • i am no longer a small town person because for christmas, i got the most perfect jacket in the world but it took me three separate orders online to try on three different sizes (!!) to get the right one that fit. thank goodness for the 'free shipping & returns' promise.
  • there's your sister....
finished_106
...and then there's you:
finished_220
i feel like an explanation isn't needed.